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Ottoelvis
  1. My HUGE list of my pets
    10th Apr 2010 00:02
    14 years, 1 month & 15 days ago
  2. Novel- Undercover 1
    9th Apr 2010 23:55
    14 years, 1 month & 15 days ago
  3. The Maramailers
    21st Dec 2009 22:46
    14 years, 5 months & 2 days ago
Novel- Undercover 1
14 years, 1 month & 15 days ago
9th Apr 2010 23:55

It was eight o???clock in the evening. It was dark, misty, scary; a perfect night for a murder. Mr. Gumble was the nicest old man in Tumsville, Australia. He wouldn???t even hurt a fly???. Or would he? Someone was planning a huge murder, and it wasn???t going to be pleasant. Mr. Gumble unfortunately had a very evil daughter, Harriet Gumble. She murders anyone who gets in her way.

Harriet worked at the Chill Caf??, and she knew every single person who went to the caf?? regularly. Mr. Debit, Mrs. Potts, Adam Ramsey, Katy Sieny, Mr. Frazer and Miss Kace where all people who were locals to the Chill Caf??. But, if Harriet murdered anyone out of them, it would have to be Miss. Kace, for she was going to marry Mr. Gumble, and share his money. Harriet wouldn???t be spoilt rotten anymore. And she wouldn???t be the only girl her father loves. So, she decided the only way to get herself out of this, was to remove Miss. Kace from this world.

Mr. Gumble was a bus driver, who had a very old Mercedes Benz convertible. He always wore his goggles and cap whilst driving his convertible so he wouldn???t get sand, flies and rain in his eyes. Harriet thought of a wonderful murder plan one day when she saw her father driving his car wearing the goggles and cap.

Harriet locked her father in his room, tying him to a chair with ropes, so he could never escape. She got some masking tape and plastered it to his face, so he couldn???t cry for help. She grabbed his goggles and cap from the kitchen bench, tied up her red hair in the cap, put on the goggles, and stole her fathers keys and off she went.

Harriet was planning to go up to Miss. Kace???s front door with a ???jar of honey???, but this ???jar of honey??? was actually a jar of bees, which is very deadly to Miss Kace, for she is allergic to bees, and her allergy could kill her.

Harriet happily walked her way to Miss Kace???s house, with the ???jar of the honey???, she slipped her goggles and cap into her pocket, and got ready to see the last of Miss Kace. When Harriet was walking up the driveway to Miss Kace???s front door, she saw a black figure already at Miss Kace???s front door. Better hide, in case they think I am going to murder someone, with that she chuckled to herself, oh wait; I AM going to murder someone. Oh well, better hide anyway. And with that she ducked into the closest bush.

This figure looked like a man; a fit, brown-headed man. Is that Mr. Debit? Or Adam Ramsey? Or MR. FRAZER??!!! Harriet ducked into the bush in front of her to get a better look. Is that a gun in his pocket, I see? Is he my new hero!? Is Miss Kace going to get killed, without me doing ANYTHING?! If I ever find out who this guy is, I am going to marry him!

Sure enough, it was a gun in his pocket. He pressed the doorbell button, and out came Miss Kace. She smiled brightly. After all, she did think a very nice friend came for a cup of tea. Her smile suddenly faded when she saw the man pull out a gun. Actually, her smile changed into a scream, if that is even possible. Then, there was a huge BANG, and Miss Kace was lying on the floor dead, with blood pouring out of her chest.

Harriet ran over to where the crime was held, and tried to find some clues so she could find out who that man was. She looked for any dropped items, and then it hit her. His gun. There had to be some type of evidence on his gun. After all, 20 seconds ago he WAS holding it. So, Harriet picked up the gun and inspected it.

It was bad timing to pick it up, though. For Sergeant Henry was just passing, and had heard a scream, and saw Harriet standing over (dead) Miss Kace with a gun. If you saw that, would you think Harriet was completely innocent? I mean, obviously Sergeant Henry started to arrest Harriet straight away.

Everyone agreed that Harriet was guilty. I mean, her own father being locked up in his room, stealing his things, standing above Miss. Kace who was dead with a gun, it all fitted in. Little did everyone know that Harriet was actually innocent! From this day beyond Harriet still wonders who the murderer was.

Guess what? Mr. Gumble killed Miss. Kace. For Miss. Kace was very rich, and Mr. Gumble just wanted her money, so he could go off with the woman he REALLY loved. Anyway, where do you think Harriet got her murdering skills from?

Ottoelvis
Yeah, I am working on it. It is gonna be about Mr. Gumble with the woman he really loved, trying to confess to her he is a murderer
114 years, 1 month & 4 days ago 21st Apr 2010 02:45
 
That's good! It moves on a bit to quickly and you might need more speech but I liked it. Is there another part to it?
114 years, 1 month & 9 days ago 16th Apr 2010 03:31
 
  1. My HUGE list of my pets
    10th Apr 2010 00:02
    14 years, 1 month & 15 days ago
  2. Novel- Undercover 1
    9th Apr 2010 23:55
    14 years, 1 month & 15 days ago
  3. The Maramailers
    21st Dec 2009 22:46
    14 years, 5 months & 2 days ago